CPAPmanLives

I try to capture the beauty around me. It's a futile en devour, but worthy of the effort. Since I no longer live in a cloud and the fog has lifted I see the beauty all around me. Sharing it. Sometimes doubting what I see and know the futility of capturing such beauty to share is a humbling experience. Who am I to judge something beautiful? This thought opens my mind to all that I see. Everything is beautiful when its' beauty is appreciated. My eyes are open as never before. I awake from sleep and not from the dead and behold I see beauty everywhere. I now appreciate what I see and am grateful for it. Everywhere I look I see beauty. I see so much clearer now. I wake from sleep, not from the dead. My super-powers are growing, but what is clear is the connection with my dogs has deepened. I see it with Tucker (Grand Perinese Wolf) and Emma (Giant Golden Doodle) and Tyler aka T-bone (95 lbs of bad attitude Golden Retriever) they spe

As I slept I slowly died. Not all the way, but die I did. Every night hypoxia would take me. I would float in deep sleep dreaming with severe apnea choking away my life. Deeper sleep meant death so my nervous system coped with this threat by nightmare. Scaring me out of the deepest levels of sleep. Shocking me awake. Over and over into the night. Never really asleep never really awake. Snoring and gasping, coughing and wheezing, rolling and dreaming, talking and walking night after night, year after year. Last to bed first to wake. A few hours a night none of it good. When things got bad I wrote about it. It appears my dreams were trying to tell me something. You are dying. Wake up. Literally you are dying while you sleep and you don't even know it. I lived in black and white. When I woke as CPAPman I could see every color in the world. It was a shock to have been so blind for so long and to have the lights turned on to all the beauty of the world. Colors so rich and deep I fel

I went to Breckinridge with my family for the weekend. I had only been wearing the CPAP for a week and was struggling with it. The mask is hard to get used to. The pump pushing air through my fat pie hole wasn't a picnic either. While exhaling I felt smothered. Ironic. When it really pumping it would blow my checks out like Louis Armstrong blasting his horn. I had some good coaching, but most nights I failed and would pull it off in my sleep. I almost didn't bring it. Was going to take a little break for the weekend, bur deep down I was sure it was already making a difference. the nights I made all night with the mask on I woke up different. Breckenridge also sits around 10,000 feet above see level. I was going to need all the help I could get. Also we were staying in a small condo so my family would suffer greatly from my snoring so the CPAP made the trip. I slept like a rock in the thin mountain air CPAP pumping away all night long. Eight hours of blissful sleep. We ate break

This was the first night for CPAPman.  Things will never be the same. Thank God.